Tuesday 7 December 2010

Jerry Saggs Eats A MOTHERFUCKIN' Hockey Stick

Nasty Boys v Cactus Jack & Kevin Sullivan (Falls Count Anywhere Match -Slamboree, 5/22/94)

Well this is just wild. I'm a huge fan of the Spring Stampede match from the previous month where Maxx Payne is Foley's partner in place of Sullivan, and while this one isn't quite as good, it's still totally nuts. The Spring Stampede match is a street fight so there's sort of a mainstream ECW feel to it that I don't recall from any other WCW or WWF match up to that point. This doesn't have the pool cues and the shovels and concession stand that the April match had, but they compensate by punching each other in the face all up and down and under the ramp and in and out and around the ring. There's one awesome table spot and they make the best use of a trash can I think I've ever seen (they use ONE trash can the entire match and by the end it's been flattened so much it's sharp enough to cut open Foley's eye), plus Saggs steals some guy in the crowd's camera and whacks Cactus with it a bunch of times, but for the most part they're using fists and boots and their own body. Actually Saggs get smacked with a hockey stick at the end too. Forgot about that. He also gets potatoed HARD by Philadelphia Flyers' legend David Schultz, who's the special ref' for the night. I mean, Schultz is just laying into him with punches that look ridiculously NOT worked. And that's before he gets blasted with a hockey stick. Crowd goes apeshit for the finish and then post-match Maxx Payne completely obliterates Saggs with a guitar. Then Dave Sullivan hits the scene and breaks a crutch on Knobbs. Wild and crazy and a ton of fun.


Goldberg v Diamond Dallas Page (Halloween Havoc, 10/25/98)

Totally boss match. Goes ten minutes and the crowd are molten the whole way through. Both guys are over huge here, too. I had forgotten how much so in the case of Page, but there's practically no difference between the reactions he's getting and the reactions Goldberg's getting. Starts off with them locking up and Page being tossed into the corner, Page running right back into a lock-up, getting tossed back into the corner, rinse, repeat a couple more times. Crowd pops huge for this because Page isn't backing down even if Goldberg is clearly throwing him around. Goldberg has the obvious strength advantage, but Page is a pitbull and doesn't plan on giving an inch. After he collects himself Page decides he'll try a different route, and this time takes Goldberg over with an armdrag. Crowd pops huge and Goldberg doesn't know what hit him, so Page tells him to bring it and Goldberg just fucking charges him and they both wind up barreling though the ropes. Schiavone's marking out on commentary and so am I because that was the best pissed off lock-up spot ever. At this point it turns into Goldberg being the most unfuckwithable video game boss in history while Page is trying to hit and run at pace while trying not to get close enough to him so that he won't get caught and murdered. Problem with that is Goldberg hardly being a dude you can easily "hit and run," which you see when Page drops down and tries to sweep his legs and Goldberg fucking BACKFLIPS out of the way. Of course Page tries it again and manages to get him down for about a second and a half, but that little sequence completely blew my mind. Next couple minutes has Goldberg in control, and it's all largely comfortable until he charges Page in the corner only for him to move and wind up going shoulder-first into the ring post. That's Page's opening, and I think it's Schiavone who says "The best way to dodge a freight truck is just to step out of the way," which a totally apt and perfect line. Next few minutes has Page working him over and Goldberg's pretty much exceptional as the wounded animal that could still rip your head off at any point. Last couple minutes are perfect. They literally hit 3 moves in total (not 3 moves each; 3 all together) in that space of time, but the best comparison I can give is the Rock/Austin match from Wrestlemania 19 where the pace at which they're moving from spot to spot is dead on and the "laying around" between each has the entire arena on edge. Don't mean to get fruity with the superlatives, but it really felt electric. Page thinking he's a Diamond Cutter away from the World Title only to turn around and have his lungs speared through his rib cage was an amazing moment. After that we finally do get the Diamond Cutter when Goldberg can't lift Page all the way up for the Jackhammer because of the injured shoulder, Page slipping behind him and dropping him with it. Crowd completely LOSE it at that. The whole idea that the Diamond Cutter can come out of nowhere, which has been built up for months at this point, is paid off here (they posed the question earlier of whether or not he could even get in close enough to hit it at all) and it's really just an incredible moment. At this point people are BELIEVING Page is gonna be the first person to actually beat this man. The nearfall is all it should be. Finish is great too, with Page trying to suplex Goldberg, Big Bill having none of that shit and just muscling him up for the Jackhammer. Seriously thought this was excellent and about as close to a WCW version of Warrior/Hogan as possible. By far my favourite match of either guy's career.

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